Round Two, Game 10 (2013-14 CPKC) Edgy over JCL

Each autumn our star parodists come out and play.

Choose One

Poll ended at Sat Feb 01, 2014 1:34 pm

If You See Me Hungry/Mickey Lolich/Rod Stewart: Do Ya Think I'm Sexy?
7
32%
I Don't Wanna Go to Buff'lo/Oliver Perez/Elvis Costello and The Attractions: (I Don't Want to Go) Chelsea
15
68%
 
Total votes : 22

Round Two, Game 10 (2013-14 CPKC) Edgy over JCL

Postby batmagadanleadoff » Thu Jan 30, 2014 1:34 pm

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Last edited by batmagadanleadoff on Sun Feb 02, 2014 11:49 pm, edited 6 times in total.

Re: Round Two, Game Ten (2013-14 CPKC)

Postby batmagadanleadoff » Thu Jan 30, 2014 1:35 pm

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If You See Me Hungry

Sugar, sugar...
He sits alone munching on concessions
Must be the fattest guy in his profession
His lips are big, his mouth is always chewing
Another donut is exactly what’s he craving

If you see me hungry and you have a Pepsi
Come on, sugar, let me go
If you really need me, just reach out and feed me
Come on, Metsies, give me more, oooh

He was a Tiger, but looking to retire
When a trade offer came over on the wire
Now hold on a minute before I go to New York
Give me a Snickers, a Slurpee and a new fork
I want McDonald’s in my high rise apartment
And a new uniform cut from a circus tent

If you see me hungry and you have a Pepsi
Come on, sugar, let me go
If you have linguini, just give some to Mickey
Come on, Metsies, give me more

His gut’s bursting like a drum
'Cause he ate bacon ice cream scones
Snack cakes are in his personal strike zone

He wakes at dawn gets breakfast at the IHoP
On the way to Shea clears the meat case from the Stop & Shop
Over in the dugout, Joe Frazier is complaining
About his lefty, and all the weight he’s gaining
He says, "I sorry, Mick I ate your tub of toffee
Did you have to turn your locker into a charcuterie?”

If you see me hungry and you have a Pepsi
Come on, Frazier, let me go
If you’re at the ballpark, pick me up some Shake Shack
Come on, Metsies, give me more

If you really feed me, just give me mo’…


Re: Round Two, Game Ten (2013-14 CPKC)

Postby batmagadanleadoff » Thu Jan 30, 2014 1:35 pm

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I Don't Wanna Go to Buff'lo

Photographs and playoff tix
Of glory days back in oh-six
Short a starter, they were in a fix
"Come see what Ollie P. inflicts!"
I plowed through the Cardinals and I shamed LaRussa
Eatin' up his lineup like a cheap pupusa
Now it's five years gone and all that is through, Suh'
They call me to the office, but I must say "Tough, yo"
I don't want to go to Buff'lo

    OH, NO! I've lost my slider!
    I don't want to throw to Schneider!
    I don't want to hit the minors!
    Downing meals in greasy diners!
    I don't want to go to Buff'lo!

Everybody hates Fred Wilpon
Fortune's changed and all good will gone
Now we've all moved out of Shea
We've forgotten how to play
(Four-bar synth riff)
Fans come screaming about Madoff swindles
And they're turnin' on me as my effectiveness dwindles
"WE-HATE-YOU-SEE-YOU-LATER-GET-LOST-SEEN-ENOUGH-GO!"
I don't want to go to Buff'lo

    OH NO! I pitch so slowly!
    I don't want to throw to Thole!
    I don't want to see lake Erie!
    Don't want see Niagra near me!
    I don't want to go to Buff'lo

I've run through all my bag of tricks
Fastball peaks at sixty-six
Warthen's plans don't work like Rick's
In the doghouse, fleas and ticks
Think about Zambrano and I start to panic
They hate you when you suck and your name's Hispanic
The ship of fate I'm on has the name "Titanic"
The radar on my fastball now is readin' "Charlie-Hough-slow"
I don't want to go to Buff'lo

    Oh shit! Like Bill's alpacas!
    Don't wanna throw to Rod Barajas!
    Meeting me ain't what soldiers need!
    I ain't goin' to Walter Reed!
    I don't want to go to Buff'lo!


Re: Round Two, Game Ten (2013-14 CPKC)

Postby d'Kong76 » Thu Jan 30, 2014 1:45 pm

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David Arthur Kingman, 1B-OF-3B 1975-1977, 1981-1983

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Shuffled my vote off to Buff'lo ... super!
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Re: Round Two, Game Ten (2013-14 CPKC)

Postby LeiterWagnerFasterStrongr » Thu Jan 30, 2014 1:52 pm

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Harold W. O'Shaughnessy, Senior VP and Treasurer

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I like fat jokes. I love the working-in of "charcuterie."

But up against "LaRussa/pupusa" and those choruses, virtually anything pales in comparison.
"Classic rock NEVER takes the weekend off."

Re: Round Two, Game Ten (2013-14 CPKC)

Postby themetfairy » Thu Jan 30, 2014 2:02 pm

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I just finished the Rod Stewart autobiography (based on CPF recommendations), which swayed me towards the Lolich parody.
In running, it doesn't matter whether you come in first, in the middle of the pack, or last. You can say, "I have finished." There is a lot of satisfaction in that - Fred Lebow

Re: Round Two, Game Ten (2013-14 CPKC)

Postby Edgy MD » Thu Jan 30, 2014 2:13 pm

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Rube Walker — Pitching Coach, 1968–1981

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These are two hard matchups.
I'll be your patron saint of heartbreak.

Re: Round Two, Game Ten (2013-14 CPKC)

Postby batmagadanleadoff » Thu Jan 30, 2014 2:15 pm

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LeiterWagnerFasterStrongr wrote:I like fat jokes. I love the working-in of "charcuterie."

But up against "LaRussa/pupusa" and those choruses, virtually anything pales in comparison.


I didn't even know what a pupusa was. I hadda look it up. I figgered it was some wormy larvae like thing.

Re: Round Two, Game Ten (2013-14 CPKC)

Postby John Cougar Lunchbucket » Thu Jan 30, 2014 2:28 pm

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Meeting me ain't what soldiers need!
I ain't goin' to Walter Reed!

brill
Let me tell you something: I have a big set of balls.

Re: Round Two, Game Ten (2013-14 CPKC)

Postby MFS62 » Thu Jan 30, 2014 3:02 pm

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Brian Cole, Outfield Prospect, 1978-2001

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Both good, but pairing linguini and Mickey did it for me.

Later
I'm smarter than you think you are.

Re: Round Two, Game Ten (2013-14 CPKC)

Postby LeiterWagnerFasterStrongr » Thu Jan 30, 2014 3:08 pm

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Insofar as they don't quite rhyme?

batmagadanleadoff wrote:I didn't even know what a pupusa was. I hadda look it up. I figgered it was some wormy larvae like thing.


As a fella with Salvadoran in-laws, lemme tell you: you oughta go have one. They're great.
"Classic rock NEVER takes the weekend off."

Re: Round Two, Game Ten (2013-14 CPKC)

Postby batmagadanleadoff » Thu Jan 30, 2014 3:14 pm

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LeiterWagnerFasterStrongr wrote:Insofar as they don't quite rhyme?

batmagadanleadoff wrote:I didn't even know what a pupusa was. I hadda look it up. I figgered it was some wormy larvae like thing.


As a fella with Salvadoran in-laws, lemme tell you: you oughta go have one. They're great.


Okay. And now that I know that a pupusa is for eating, I'm wondering if it shoulda been in the Lolich parody.

Re: Round Two, Game Ten (2013-14 CPKC)

Postby Edgy MD » Thu Jan 30, 2014 9:46 pm

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LeiterWagnerFasterStrongr wrote:Insofar as they don't quite rhyme?

batmagadanleadoff wrote:I didn't even know what a pupusa was. I hadda look it up. I figgered it was some wormy larvae like thing.


As a fella with Salvadoran in-laws, lemme tell you: you oughta go have one. They're great.

Having a pupusa connection in your life is a blessed thing.
I'll be your patron saint of heartbreak.

Re: Round Two, Game 10 (2013-14 CPKC) *POLL ENDED*

Postby John Cougar Lunchbucket » Sun Feb 02, 2014 12:06 am

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Congrats to Edgy (or maybe Sharpie?) I voted for you.
Let me tell you something: I have a big set of balls.

Re: Round Two, Game 10 (2013-14 CPKC) Edgy over JCL

Postby Edgy MD » Sun Feb 02, 2014 7:09 am

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Holy crap. A worthy competition, but I could have sworn yours was the Tanana one.

I was sending fixes for this song to Magadan past the deadline. To his credit he didn't allow the last one or two which hurt my cahnfidence.

"Give me a Snickers, a Slurpee and a new fork" was the chilling line that told me I was up against a heavyweight. In fact, I think I'm going to head out to 7-Eleven and celebrate with exactly that.
I'll be your patron saint of heartbreak.

Re: Round Two, Game 10 (2013-14 CPKC) Edgy over JCL

Postby batmagadanleadoff » Wed Feb 05, 2014 1:19 am

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Edgy MD wrote:I was sending fixes for this song to Magadan past the deadline. To his credit he didn't allow the last one or two which hurt my cahnfidence.


I don't remember this.

Re: Round Two, Game 10 (2013-14 CPKC) Edgy over JCL

Postby Edgy MD » Wed Feb 05, 2014 8:30 am

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Note, for instance, my mis-spelling of "Niagra."
I'll be your patron saint of heartbreak.


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